I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
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