Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
