I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
