So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
