i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize