Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
literally had 100 drinks last night.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
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