Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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