I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
