So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
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