Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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