i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize