She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Randomize
