My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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