yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
