Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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