Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I wish i was in the wii world.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Randomize