Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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