I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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