YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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