Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
