i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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