So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I AM VODKA MAN
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Randomize
