What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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