I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
porn star boner night. come get it.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize