Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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