It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
The power of my boobs compel you
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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