i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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