I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
tell me about the fingering
Randomize