The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
