Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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