I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Randomize
