By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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