I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
handjob tips. give me some.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
