I'm lost and stupid without you.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize