i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
