Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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