"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
