She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize