i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Randomize
