Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize