butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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