HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize