who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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