Your tits are I can't wait for
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
