Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
She announced her abortion via fbk
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
