don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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