We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Can you bring me the toilet please
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize