That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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