Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I checked into jail on foursquare
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Randomize