Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(905): View more from Toronto

I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..

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(443): View more from Maryland

I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.

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(516): View more from New York

good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(231): View more from Michigan

I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.

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(702): View more from Nevada

Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.

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(214): View more from Texas

If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza

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