either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
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