i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
