you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
